I found this difficult moment in time scribbled at the bottom of an old notepad on the dining room table, which I have not used for dining in years. It seemed worth preserving.
Well and properly I sit here by my lonely dinner, somebody assessing the miniature violet daisies and field flowers aglow in their vase; I keep that filled with fresh flowers for you. The houseplants grow perceptibly and vigorously green, day by day; some we nursed to health as little things when we first met. The sounding board of classical piano fills the room, our radio bringing the room alive, as we always did.
|And reflections of interior lighting and illuminated walls, these overlay the exterior panes with a layer of light and color that we loved.
But through all this I see the piercing blackness of a cold winter night. I can sense all this and there is no one to tell. Your place at the table is empty, and I am free to reflect in my own time and place on an abstract beauty that has no specific concrete value to me now. I, the neutral spectator, watch myself watch the world, and it watches me to see, I suppose, whether I shall still wash the dishes because they are there to be done as I always do them, or whether, perhaps, I shall just leave them for a different me to do another day.
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Ah, Phoenix! This first weekend of March, it’s T-shirt weather (low 70’s), the sun is bright and makes everything crystal clear, and the winter rains have brought a profusion of poppy blooms to the back yard (see also our posting in Photo NOTES).
It’s impossible not to sit out on the back porch. It’s quiet and peaceful. Some European Starling is doing a credible imitation of a cat meowing. Other Starlings are making their more celebrated “popslider” sound. The palms abound with a dozen different species of happily chirping birds, and one could only imagine that the whole worls is at peace.
Winter rains have also brought a profusion of weeds. I’ve hired a guy to tackle the front yard on his own timetable over the next two weeks, with the lure of cash when the job is complete. It’s too much for me to tackle by myself – I spent an hour on a 25 square foot patch out by the driveway. I hope it works out.
I return to the Bay Area early tomorrow AM – with Spring Training down here in Phoenix, all the other flights were already booked up weeks ago. People say you can rent out a house for a grand a night. I bet those houses don’t have weed-choked front yards, though.
Wish I could stay here for a week. Right now, here, today, at this instant, the weather is the kind of cool idyllic tranquility you remember for years. But that’s the kind of treat that makes such a short weekend turnaround so especially worthwhile.
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Swan and I are trying to find out the name of this flower. I think is it in the Lily family, ‘Crinum’, and very possibly one of the many-talented, ubiquitous amyrillis. (Click the image for a link to a related photo in Friends Gallery).
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