The Christian Coalition’s strategic insertion of their 1998 convert-a-queer ad

The great masses of the people … will more easily fall victims to a great lie than to a small one. – Adolf Hitler

Why does this keep happening? What happens next? How do we reconcile this story with another one? Where’s the consistency? Who’s the constituency? Who’s getting hurt? Who benefits? What happens if this policy gets implemented consistently? And, most of all, is it right?

“There is a very old mathematician’s and logician’s paradox concerning the logical analysis of the following statement: “I’m a Talking Crow, said the talking crow”. If the crow did indeed say that, then the statement is true. But if the crow did not say that, or if the crow lied, then the logical truth or falsehood of the statement may be argued forever.”

Well, they said it was coming. The Alameda Newspaper Group (ANG) announced it Saturday, while the Saturday San Francisco Chronicle rejected it, and then seemingly ignored it. “It” had already appeared in eastern papers, in New York and Baltimore, a full week earlier. Like a bad dose of poison oak, it spread westward.

High priests and ayatollahs: Paid for by some 35 notoriously “Decent Christian” outfits like “Christian Coalition”, “Center For Reclaiming America”, “Colorado For Family Values” and “Exodus International”, The Ad finally hit the Sunday edition of the San Francisco Examiner. Sponsored by an honor roll of high priests and ayatollahs of intolerance, The Ad touched a lot of raw nerves with a lot of slickly packaged lies, quarter-truthes and stale rhetoric.

Now, if ever there were a hotbed of freethinking, independent, tolerant, diversity-minded citizens, San Francisco would be it. Gay people are used to being smeared, and there really are few surprises coming out of Lou Sheldon country. But now, real Christians are being “smeared by association”. This was an event you wouldn’t want to miss.

Even “agressive activists” have to take care of Family Values first. I got our load of whites into the washer. You know … Bold does seem to leave the clothes a little bit softer, but I do like the big white plastic buckets they package the Clout in. They’re great for washing the Bronco. And, I did manage to water our lawn and the gardens. The squirrels are digging the new bedding plants up as fast we we can plant them. It’s tough, being a decent citizen.

Gay people do their laundry one load at a time, same as everybody else.

And, today’s the day to take out the garbage. But this is close enough.

So, there it was, in the Metro section.

“Thank you Trent Lott, Reggie White, and recording artists Angie and Debbie Winans for having the courage to speak the truth about sexual sin.”

That smug healing glow: It seems that those most badly infected with the smug healing glow of self-righteous rectitude, when preparing to smear their opponents clean into the next county, always praise themselves for having the courage to speak the truth. Why is this?

“For years Christians have taken a stand in the public square against agressive homosexual activism. We’ve paid a heavy price, with sound-bite lables like ‘bigot’, and ‘homophobe’. But all along we’ve had a hand extended, something largely unreported in the media…an open hand that offers healing for homosexuals, not harassment. We want reason in this debate, not rhetoric.”

Is that all there was to it? Was it a surprise? As Jay Leno says, “Well, DUUUHH!”

It was, as promised, the complete full-page ad. If you follow this stuff, there were no big surprises. If you understand the litany, the rhetoric and symbolism, it was crude and heavy-handed. If you don’t, “slick”, “clever”, “divisive” and “sow the seeds of doubt” come to mind. The Examiner ran a feature editorial to repudiate their own ad.

We’re not going to tell you what to think. We are going to ask you to think about the points we raise, even if you think you already agree with us.. A complete, “point-by-point” refutation of the Christian Coalition isn’t appropriate here. Most readers know better already.

The evidence of your own senses, based on trust built in millions of men and women we live and work with every day, should tell you something’s up with these “Reclaiming America” creatures. If you don’t trust or understand gay men or women, we’d just say chances are good that you come from a section of the country, or a subculture, where you haven’t had an opportunity to find out.

Maybe you’ve been pressured not to.

Just because you won’t take a stand or “alignment”on trampling the civil liberties of millions of American men and women doesn’t automatically make you a bad person, or a good one. Just be aware you’re the folks these “Decent Christian” folks are targeting. In short, you’re being exploited.

When we see someone physically, politically or personally attacked because of their race, religion, sex or sexual orientation, we are morally obligated to speak out against it, because it’s wrong.

Now let me be perfectly clear on this.

Gay people do their laundry one load at a time, same as everybody else. It could be true that some of us fold it a little better, but you wouldn’t want to use me as an example of that. We’re a diverse community.

CONNECTIONS

Now that we’ve gotten past the awkward part, I’d like to address the rest of this article to some connections that aren’t likely to be looked at as the package deal the Christian Coalition is asking this country to buy. The Examiner can fend for itself.

	The Christian Coalition has proliferated itself into dozens or hundreds of cells, but it hasn’t changed its spots. It derives political power by dividing people into the chosen and the damned.
	Many folks are saying the Christian Coalition isn’t really Christian.
	There is no other subculture movement in the United States that so closely parallels the political agenda and spiritual intolerance of the ayatollahs and imams of the Iranian religious regime. Is that Christianity as you understand it?

EXECUTIONS:

	The Rev. Lou Sheldon, who got his start on the road to glory preaching intolerance in Walnut Creek, rose to prominence in the Christian Coalition. Rev. Lou said: “In the Kingdom of God, homosexuals would be executed.” He’s spent the rest of his career denying that you can draw any secular conclusions from that statement.
	Ralph Reed, a political opportunist who flits from coalition to coalition, says that The Ad probably will damage the Christian Coalition more than help it. Ralph is the spin-doctor who’s managed to attach an air of grassroots political legitimacy to a baldfaced bigotry platform.

“I am not a talking crow”, said the Talking Crow:

	The 850 “former homosexuals” who lent their name to the Exodus deprogramming ministry are not necessarily bad people. “The truth of God’s healing Love” didn’t change their basic sexual orientation, just their political and religious orientation.
	Control the consensus: Just because a person sympathizes with the Christian Coalition agenda, doesn’t automatically make them a “bad guy.” As long as people struggle to understand and form social consensus, there will be others struggling to control that consensus. Good people can buy into getting duped, too – particularly when they’re struggling with that which they don’t want to understand.
	According to fundamentalist religions, human sexuality is nasty and sinful, except when controlled and directed by whichever church happens to have the upper hand politically.
	The “Kinsey Sliding Scale” of human sexuality: some of the “850″ would always have been predominantly gay. Some of them would always have been predominantly heterosexual. The numbers and the theory also say many would always have been bisexual.
	That still only means one’s love of partner has something to do with one’s choice of partner. “Well, DUUUHH!”
	Reprogramming, like hypnotism and immersion therapy, requires the cooperation of the subject. The evidence is that it won’t work (sexually) for people who are almost exclusively oriented toward a side of the scale they are unable to accept.
	As always, when two people who are in love are trying to make it work, other people shouldn’t mess with it.
	My heart goes out to the 850. Securing a happy household with a chosen permanent partner should come first. Saddling the partnership with an intrusive political and religious superstructure practically guarantees broken homes, one of the other things “CC” claims to cure.
	“CC” points to destructive behavior, like gay alcoholism and drug abuse, as symptomatic of “the visible response to a broken heart”. We kick you, and you cry. Come unto us, my son.

	Survey (in same newspaper section): “Alarming rate of Anti-Gay violence”. “Well, DUUUHH!”
	Same survey: “the majority (of assailants) do not fit the stereotype of the hate-filled extremist. Rather, they are average young people who do not see anything wrong with their behavior. And the reason they don’t see anything wrong is simple – no one is telling them that it is wrong.”

The overwhelming evidence: given scientific research and volumes of recorded personal testimony, sexual orientation probably really is patterned at or before birth. But, if it wasn’t, if all the experts were wrong, so what?

PREPARATION “CC”

	The “Christian Coalition” party line is that, if human sexuality can be chosen, it can be sinful.
	To be “sinful”, it must be a choice, and it must go against the proscriptions of the church elders.
	The “CC” party line is that, if it’s sinful, well, anybody knows it should be against the law.
	If it’s against the law, well, isn’t that “sinful”?

	Sin Doctors: The “CC sin-doctors” are pushing the notion that their personal views on private morality should become the law of the land, i.e., that personal non-invasive behavior isn’t personal, it’s a matter of public policy.
	As we run the church, so should ye run the country.

What’s It All About, Alfie?

	This isn’t really about sexual orientation and lifestyle at all. It’s about a self-appointed religious minority imposing the whole gamut of fundamentalist conservative religious credo upon the entire country, by force.
	It’s happened in other countries, like Iran. It could happen here.
	It’s ruining the Republican Party. If “CC” succeeds in splintering this group badly enough, a whole new power base could emerge. It’s already emerging.
	Out of Control: That party, which began on a platform of “don’t tread on me” and “live and let live”, seems unable to control a dangerous new movement to regiment American life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
	Under Attack: You’ll see, under attack today, the ways in which we choose to: watch television, surf the Internet, read the news, buy a drink, become employed, teach our children, attend church, exchange e-mail, criticize the government, make a date for Saturday night, or choose a lifelong partner.

Startling Conclusions:

	Gay people do their laundry one load at a time, same as everybody else.
	When we see someone physically, politically or personally attacked because of their race, religion, sex or sexual orientation, we are morally obligated to speak out against it, because it’s wrong.
	“If you love someone, you’ll tell them the truth”. Even if it means telling them to butt out.
	Think about it. Is the Christian Coalition agenda what you want for future generations? If you don’t think so, tell them to butt out — in no uncertain terms.
	Back to the real world. The laundry’s ready for folding. Life goes on, with or without the wackos. But don’t turn your back.
	I admit it took me a while to decide the Examiner was right in accepting this ad. This matter must be aired. I could not find the ad online. The Examiner has long supported gay/lesbian coverage in the Bay Area. Readers interested in finding out about real people might check out Everyday People on the Examiner website.

Propaganda must not serve the truth, especially insofar as it might bring out something favorable for the opponent. – Adolf Hitler

A Talking Crow Production
Alex Forbes, August 16, 1998