Lying


One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river,
his ax fell into the river.  When he cried out, the Lord appeared and
asked, "Why are you crying?"  The woodcutter replied that his ax has fallen
into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.  The Lord went down
into the water and reappeared with a golden axe.  "Is this your axe?" the
Lord asked.  The woodcutter replied, "No."  The Lord again went down and
came up with a silver axe.  "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.  Again, the
woodcutter replied, "No."  The Lord went down again and came up with an
iron axe.  "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.  The woodcutter replied,
" Yes."  The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three
axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.

Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the
riverbank, and his wife fell into the river.  When he cried out, the Lord
again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"  "Oh Lord, my wife has
fallen into the water!"  The Lord went down into the water and came up with
Jennifer Lopez.  "Is this your wife?" the Lord asked.  "Yes," cried the
woodcutter.  The Lord was furious.  "You lied!  That is an untruth!"  The
woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord.  It is a misunderstanding.
You see, if I had said 'no' to Jennifer Lopez, you would have come up with
Catherine Zeta-Jones.  Then if I also said 'no' to her, you would have come
up with my wife.  Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given all three to
me.  Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care of all three
wives, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to Jennifer Lopez."  The moral of this
story is: Whenever a man lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, and
for the benefit of others.  That's our story, and we're sticking to it!

8-23-2003


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