Kids' Instructions On Life


Never trust a dog to watch your food. - Patrick, Age 10

When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents. - Matthew, Age 12

Never smart off to a teacher whose eyes and ears are twitching. - Andrew, Age 9

Wear a hat when feeding seagulls. - Rocky, Age 9

Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning. - Stephanie, Age 8

Never try to hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. - Rosemary, Age 7

Don't flush the john when your dad's in the shower. Lamar - Age 10

Never ask for anything that costs more than five dollars when your parents are doing taxes. - Carrol, Age 9

Never bug a pregnant mom. - Nicholas, Age 11

Don't ever be too full for dessert. - Kelly, Age 10

When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him. - Heather, Age 16

Never tell your mom her diet's not working. - Michael, Age 14

Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat. - Joel, Age 12

When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone. - Alyesha, Age 13

Never try to baptize a cat. - Laura, Age 13

Never do pranks at a police station. - Sam, Age 10

Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving. - Rob, Age 10

Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your mom told you to do. - Hank, Age 12

Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand. - Molly, Age 11

Listen to your brain. It has lots of information. - Chelsey, Age 7

Stay away from prunes. - Randy, Age 9

Never dare your little brother to paint the family car. - Phillip, Age 13

Forget the cake, go for the icing. - Cynthia, Age 8

Remember the place you are always welcome: grandma's house. - Joanne, Age 11


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