Feeling Old Today?

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things. Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of that year's incoming freshmen. Here is the year's list for1999:

1. The people who are starting college this past fall across the nation were born in 1980.

2. They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan Era and did not know he had ever been shot.

3. They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged.

4. Black Monday 1987 is as significant to them as the Great Depression.

5. There has been only one Pope. They can only really remember one president.

6. They were 11 when the Soviet Union broke apart and do not remember the Cold War.

7. They have never feared a nuclear war. "The Day After" is a pill to them, not a movie.

8. They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.

9. Tianamen Square means nothing to them.

10. Their lifetime has always included AIDS.

11. Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.

12. Atari predates them, as do vinyl albums.

13. The expression "you sound like a broken record" means nothing to them.

14. They have never owned a record player.

15. They have likely never played Pac Man and have never heard of Pongee

16. Star Wars looks very fake to them, and the special effects are pathetic.

17. There have always been red M&M's and blue ones are not new. There used to be beige ones?

18. They may have heard of an 8 track, but probably never have actually seen or heard one.

19. The Compact Disc was introduced when they were 1 year old.

20. As far as they know, stamps have always cost about 32 cents.
What about 6-cent airmail stamps?

21. They have always had an answering machine.

22. Most have never seen a TV set with only 13 channels, nor have they seen a black-and-white TV.

23. They have always had cable.

24. There have always been VCR's, but they have no idea what BETA is.

25. They cannot fathom not having a remote control.

26. They were born the year that Walkmen were introduced by Sony.

27. Roller-skating has always meant inline for them.

28. The Tonight Show has always been with Jay Leno

29. They have no idea when or why Jordache jeans were cool.
Relax, overblown puffery isn't unique to any generation.

30. Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.

31. They have never seen Larry Bird play, and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar is football player.

32. They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.

33. The Vietnam War is as ancient history to them as WW1, WW2 or even the Civil War.

34. They have no idea that Americans were ever held hostage in Iran.

35. They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.

36. They don't know who More was or where he was from.
Don't they mean "Mork" of "Mork and Mindy"? Why would anyone want to know where he was from?

37. They never heard: "Where's the beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel, " or "de plane, de plane!"

38. They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. is.
"Dallas", the show which tried to elevate the Soaps to the status of respectability, is no more. Interestingly, the really mediocre soaps, such as "General Hospital" and "Days Of Our Lives", still play to a big audience.

39. The Titanic was found? I thought we always knew where it was.

40. Michael Jackson has always been white.

41. Kansas, Chicago, Boston, America, and Alabama are places, not groups.

42. Mickey D's never came in Styrofoam containers.

43. There has always been MTV

44. To which I might add: and it's always been that way. I wish someone from our parents' or grandparents' generation would come up with a "prequel". I'll post it! -- Alex

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